Have no Fear, Bush is STILL here!

Well, we were able to FINALLY turn off those brain-rotting political TV commercials; at least the conclusion of this election cycle spares us of having to view another one of these for a while.

On the other hand, WOOHOO! WE DID IT! Bush not only got elected but he is the first president since, well, his dad, to win a majority of the vote.

If Kerry fought half as hard against the Viet Cong as he appears to be ready to fight his way into the Whitehouse we not only would have won in Vietnam but the USSR would have been vanquished in 1968.

Nixon once said “politics tends to attract two different types: those who want to do big things and those who want to be big people.” Kerry has already shown that—for Kerry—this was all about his lifelong ambition of being the president. .

Winners:

The United States. A Kerry victory would send the message that America had decided to be a quitter in her war on terrorists. Our allies would know that this would be the beginning of the end of the resistance to the jihadists. Our allies are too weak to carry this war to the jihadists without the support of the world’s only superpower; they would be forced to find some accommodation with the jihadists.

(update: the following paragraph had a few words changed for clarity)
A Kerry victory would damage America’s reputation for resolve. America’s reputation suffered following Vietnam because both our allies and our enemies believed—with good reason—that we were irresolute and unreliable.

A Kerry defeat means that America’s honor will remain unstained by losing our war in Iraq; the jihadists would win by default when Kerry abandons the battlefields while leaving our enemies in control of them.

The U.S. Military: John Kerry has never failed to side with this country’s wartime enemies. He sided with the communists during the Vietnam War. He sided with the USSR and Cuba when he opposed Reagan’s efforts to support the freedom fighters in Nicaragua and to fight the communist insurrection in El Salvador. He adopted the USSR’s “Nuclear Freeze” policy when he opposed Reagan’s deployment of Pershing and cruise missiles to balance the USSR’s SS20’s, which were already deployed in Eastern Europe. And, of course, he sided with Saddam Hussein during Gulf War I when he voted against removing Saddam from Kuwait in 1992.

Simply put, the U.S. Military can continue their mission confident that they will not be double-crossed by their commander-in-chief.

The Iraqi people: (Update: this paragraph was rewritten for clarity.) They will not be abandoned to face the jihadists and neo-Baathists. They will not have to face Iranian and Syrian proxy forces alone. They will not have a Lebanon-style puppet regime forced on them. They will not have to deal with a sectarian civil war

Put another way, they will not share the fate that the South Vietnamese people suffered in 1975.

Michael Moore: Yes Michael Moore. Anti-American propaganda has made him a rich man and another four years of a non-Democratic Party administration will be “berry berry good for him.”

(update: added the following paragraph)
The SwiftVets: The SwiftVets took down Kerry. They finally got a little fragment of justice and retribution—greatly delayed—for John Kerry’s betrayal so many years ago.

(update: added the following paragraph)
Karl Rove: What can I say? Bush’s general led his army to victory.

(update: added the following paragraph)
George Bush: FOXNews states that this is the first presidential reelection to add both Senate and House seats since 1932.

Losers:

al Qaeda Special mention for Osama bin Laden and Abu Musab al-Zarqawi

The Anti-American left: Special mention for
Michael Moore.
MoveOn.org
George Soros
CBS (Update: for Ra^therBogusGate)
The Guardian (Hey Guardian: how did that transatlantic letter writing campaign work out? (Hint: Bush carried Clark County, OH))
NY Times
Hollywood
Update: Bruce Springsteen: Just Shut Up and Sing.

the Axis of Evil: Special mention for, Iran and Syria. Extra special mention for Kim Jong Il since he suffered the double indignities of both Bush’s reelection AND Team America.

the Axis of Weasels: Special mention for the French and the Germans.

The UN: Special mention for the Kofi Annan ( for Bush’s pursuit of the UN Oil for UNSC Vetoes scandal) and Mohammed El Baradei (who Bush is trying to get fired).

The Democrats:
Lost Daschle, the Democrat’s Senate minority leader (In your FACE!), (Update II: Daschle is the first Senate leader to be unseated since 1952)
Lost seats in both the House and the Senate
And, of course, the two big guys themselves, John Kerry and John Edwards, lost their election.